Monday, 18 October 2010

The bum jiggle

A reason to go to the gym.
The bum jiggle.  I’m not talking about the everyday bum jiggle that makes me want to throw on the pajama pants and curl up under a duvet with chocolate.  I’m talking about the treadmill bum jiggle. 
I’m not really a runner.  But I have been giving it a go at the gym.  The first few weeks were agony.  It took ages to get a rhythm.  With the help of Kenny Loggins and the Footloose soundtrack, I finally found a good pace, slow, but good.  Then there was the bum jiggle.  This is the painful bouncing of skin, and what has to be fat, with every step that brings up the image of saddlebags bouncing along at a Pony Express gallop.  It probably isn’t noticeable to the runner on the treadmill behind you, but it feels like there should be a thumping soundtrack synched with every bounce.    Within a few minutes it goes away, or at least you get numb to it.  But at the start of every run, there it is.  I immediately think two things simultaneously:  why am I putting my bouncing saddlebags on display and this effort better be worth it.  It’s almost enough to make you stop running.
I had been in a good routine with going to the gym about three times a week and running at each session.  Then I took about two weeks off.  No reason really, I just didn’t go.  Tuesday was the first day back.  It was torture getting ready to walk out the door and I was dreading it every step of the 10 minute walk to the gym.  But once you’re there, there isn’t anything to do but get on a machine and join in the sweaty show.  I began my workout, it sucked, it was hard.  Then I got to the running bit.  And there is was, the bum jiggle.  I was horrified.  I had forgotten about it and there in front of a line of waiting, stretching runners was the triumphant return of the bouncing saddlebags. 
But in the midst of my horror, I realized that the runs must be working in order for me to forget about this horror.  I try to remind myself it's about building a healthy lifestyle not about looking good or fitting into my jeans without extra lumps.  Who am I kidding?  The thrill of buttoning up a pair of pants saved at the back of the drawer (because someday...) feels awesome right then and there.  I am all about the instant gratification. 
Time to head to the gym again (I haven't since Tuesday).  Hello bum jiggle.  Let's try not to meet too often.  

No comments:

Post a Comment