30. My Body
It has taken almost 33 years, but I am thankful for the body I live in everyday.
Sure, I frequently wish it was a bit taller or my legs a bit longer or leaner. I curse my thick calves almost daily.
But lately, my body and I have come to an understanding and I am very thankful for this new relationship. Awhile ago I wrote about how, until recently, I didn’t connect with my body. I viewed it as a separate entity.
Slowly, I have come to love my stick straight hair and unevenly long torso. The more I run, the more I appreciate the muscle of my legs. I spent years cursing the curvature of those thighs and calves. Then I remember that those legs and accompanying muscles made me dance. Those muscles made it possible to do something that I loved and those memories keep me very warm.
Yes, those curves make it difficult to find trousers that fit to my liking. At times I still get hot and bothered trying to squeeze into jeans that were not made for my particular curves, despite the marketing. Okay, honestly, I always get hot and bothered trying on trousers. I get increasingly frustrated because I am convinced I am not the only woman with curvy legs trying to find a suitable pair of jeans.
But today I had a thought. Instead of becoming frustrated, maybe I should revel in the fact that my body is unique. This particular set of measurements and lengths and curves is all my own. And perhaps, as Karen would tell me, they are beautifully different.
With all my complaints and angst and Weight Watchers, I am incredibly lucky in my body. Yes the knees are knocked about a bit, the wrist is a bit weak, one thumb is permanently the size of an eight year old’s, but it is healthy. It has never had any serious problems and the more I connect with it, the more it gives me in return. Each of the minor ‘flaws’ I see are stories of my life. The knocked knees from dancing, the wrist from dancing and writing, the thumb from a childhood bike accident. (The thumb precipitated my husband’s first conversation with me.) The numerous scars contribute to the story. A cat scratch, elephant skin, web burn, honeymoon snorkelling, a band camp accident.
Today, on the first Day of Thanks, I thank my body for its work and am grateful for its continued support.