Friday, 27 January 2012


I’ve been writing the Chronicles for about a year now and while I am much less reluctant lately, I haven’t given up the idea of a life outside of the house. 
The initial angst related to the ‘Reluctant’ tag had to do with choice.  I wasn’t choosing the ‘Housewife’ title.  I became a housewife because I couldn’t do anything else. 
Granted, my situation wasn’t in the same league as the housewives fighting to go to college and have a career all those decades ago.  I was over-educated and over-qualified and ‘student’ became ‘housewife.’  But it wasn’t my choice and it seemed inevitable and inescapable. 
Because that’s the point of feminism, right?  The ability and right to choose your path. 
Up until the point of my induction into ‘housewife-dom’ I had taken full advantage of the feminist movement.  I eschewed almost all ‘traditionally feminine’ skills and roles and had got myself educated to the fullest extent in my chosen field. 
Then I went and got married, very traditionally and totally by choice.  But despite my declarations that I would change my name, I didn’t.
I had all intentions of following through with my name change declaration but when I ended up as a housewife it was too much to ask.  It felt too much like the universe was forcing me down a traditional road I had previously detoured. 

So why now?  What happened in the last 18 months to change my mind?

A lot. 

And not so much. 

A lot has changed in the way I think and approach my life as a Mrs.  What hasn’t changed is the bond and relationship and partnership Pete and I built over the last six years.  That isn’t entirely accurate.  Our ‘thing’ has changed, but only in so much that we are stronger than we have ever been.  It is a subtle and slow deepening of roots.  It is this ‘non-change’ that facilitated my eventual change in thought patterns and approach to life.
I’ll expand on those new thought patterns in the future. 

The ‘news’ for today is my choice to look for part-time work.  Part-time.  Because I want to continue my housewife ways but still have a personal need to contribute to society and our joint bank account.
This morning I applied for a part-time job with a very prestigious institution.  It’s a long shot but I’m more than qualified.  Here’s hoping my qualifications coupled with a lack of career ambition make me the perfect candidate.   

Fingers crossed.

1 comment:

  1. I'm right there with you again. After being unemployed/a full-time housewife for just over a year, I was feeling the itch to get out more, contribute financially, have a regular schedule, etc. However, I only applied for part-time positions, and select ones, at that (privileged, I know-- but since I have the opportunity to be choosy, I'm not going to waste it). When I told people I'd been hired for an hourly pt position, many responded with, "Well, that can lead to full-time!" But the truth of the matter is... I'm happy with my schedule as it is. Right now, I'd rather have time to cook healthy stuff from scratch, work on personal projects, exercise, run errands, clean, do laundry, pay bills-- even if it means earning less money and having less 'prestige.' B wouldn't care a bit if I wanted to work 40hrs/wk, but he's also cool with me working part-time. Frankly, our lives run more smoothly when one of us has more time to devote to housekeeping (doesn't matter which one of us, and it used to be B, when I was in grad school; at this juncture it's me and I'm happy with that arrangement). Maybe I won't always feel this way, maybe circumstances won't continue to allow for me to be the lower wage-earner. But for the time being, this is my choice and it's right for us.