Monday, 22 November 2010

15 Days of Thanks

To be honest, I am not using this trip to its full advantage and so have little to be grateful for on this particular day besides the usual of good health, ability to travel, etc. 
But here’s what I have been thinking about today and maybe it will lead to a bit of thanks.
This has something to do with what I call Hotel Limbo.  With the exception of the French TV, this could be any hotel room in any city.  I always feel this way about hotels (especially business park or conference hotels) they have a way of stripping away the excitement of a new city.  They then produce a feeling of ‘time off’ from life, a limbo that isn’t enticed by the surrounding business park.  By enticed, I mean I’m not enticed to go out and explore.  Nevermind that the Champs-Elysees is less than 5 minutes away on the RER train.  You would never know it to sit here.  Although, if you wander through the empty skyscrapers at night you can see the Arc de Triomphe in the distance. 
But this caused me to think about the way we were the last time we were in Paris.  We could hardly wait to get out there and explore.  It didn’t hurt that we spotted the Eiffel Tower out of our hotel room the first night.  We passed it each night on the way home and have a million photos of it.  We ran out of money quite early which limited our meals to crepes and fresh bread and our activities to wandering the streets.  We continually got slightly lost and so wandered hand in hand until we happened upon a street that was major enough to be on our map.  It was wonderful.  And it’s part of the reason I don’t want to go and wander alone.  I have someone to wander and wonder with, why go it alone?
This got me to thinking about our new little family and the people we have become together.  We have changed a bit being so dependent on each other.  It made me wonder how much we have changed since we met each other on our fabulously romantic African Adventure.  In the midst of Pete’s growing career and my schooling and now flailing career, I wonder if we have lost our sense of adventure for being more sensible.  It is inevitable I suppose as we get older, but we should still be able to be adventurous while we have the time, or when we have the time. 
This little trip was suppose to be a bit of a break for us.  A change of scenery and maybe a kick in the pants for us to gain back some of our adventurous and wondrous spark.  Other than the hotel room, it is pretty par for the course.  Pete is still working 11 hour days, I’m still writing and watching TV.  It is a bit of a pisser to have to go out to get a cup of tea or coffee as well as lunch and dinner.  As much as our nightly routine of making dinner and clearing up can be a chore at the end of the day.  We are missing our time together in the kitchen and the freedom to eat what we want, the way we want. 
So maybe that’s it today.  I am thankful for our domestic routine.  It takes being out of it to really appreciate the work we do to make our meals each night and the time spent together enjoying it and even the annoyance of the clear-up. 
This is something that I have been fighting with for a long time.  I am continually conflicted about how much I enjoy making our home and taking care of meals, house, etc.  I guess enjoy isn’t exactly right word, maybe it is more pride and contentment.  My mom loathes these activities and it always felt anti-feminist to take care and pride in keeping house.  But then I had a mom was forced to do these domestic tasks and forced to go to typing school because her mom thought she shouldn’t do anything else as a woman.  She ran from it, I have run to it a bit. 

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